Woof

26 September 2010 7 Comments

Each and every dog my family has owned has been a female. Why this is? I have no clue. Maybe it’s because I’ve always feared owning the male dog of all male dogs?

The kind that has no clue of it being impossible to mate with a pillow. The kind that is always on the prowl for an unassuming leg to woo. (Sweeping the chosen leg off it’s feet, so to speak.) The kind that likes getting to know a person by sniffing the unfortunate soul in places where no dog should go.

The dog we have now is a first for us….a male. And while he’s had his share of Girlfriends around the house, legs are just not up his alley. Befitting of the rest of my never typical, “this-just-can’t-be-my-life” life? My dog harasses our (never to return) guests by sniffing……..their ears.

Yes, ears.

Jumps up on the sofa. Gets behind their heads and sniffs their ears. Incessantly. Are you clear yet on how embarrassing this is? How do you explain this to a person?

I have a deviant dog that finds your ears more of a turn on than your ‘thang?

(Notice I haven’t used one x rated word yet here?)

I am stumped and one stop short of carrying this dog around in a backpack or babysling. The non-returning guests are becoming a bummer.

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7 Comments. Click to leave one of your own!

September 26 2010 at 10:09 PM Susan said:

Now I never heard of that, but our dog likes to lick my husband’s head, my son’s arms, and my husband (and occasionally my ) pillow case-yuck! Although these are all family members-the ears of a stranger is entirely different. LOL!
Susan´s last [type] ..Aw heck- he still loves me

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Nancy
@ifevolution on twitter.

Replied on : September 30th, 2010 at 3:56 PM

Mortifying!

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September 27 2010 at 10:33 AM Lauren
@lalabh on twitter.
said:

Awww- he is a cutie and can sniff my ears anytime Enjoy your boy

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September 27 2010 at 8:39 PM Unknown Mami said:

Well,that’s quite a fetish your dog has.
Unknown Mami´s last [type] ..I Comment Therefore I Am

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September 29 2010 at 1:29 PM Molly said:

I’ve only had girl dogs too! Not sure why that was though!

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October 4 2010 at 6:57 PM Pam
@pammlofton on twitter.
said:

We have always had those males dogs–one had a very passionate relationship with blankets. Any blanket. Our little one now prefers stuffed animals. I just always found the males to be ‘nicer’ than the females. Of course, now that we’re in our empty nest phase of life, there does seem to be a bit too much testosterone floating around the house! Absolutely hilarious about the ears! Love your blog!
Pam´s last [type] ..Good Samaritans are Alive and Well in DC

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