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Just Say No

6 October 2009 19 Comments

justsaynoSo here’s my day today (the condensed version because I’m pretty sure you don’t want the hourly play-by-play). After my son goes off to elementary school, I:

Handle work emails, head off to the client du jour, come home around 2, head over to the school and dig through HSO mail, pick up my son, get him over to Hebrew school. run back home, handle more work from my business, pick him up from Hebrew school, shuffle him over to Football practice, handle football related issues for the next two hours, get him dinner, check his homework, answer HSO emails, finish up paperwork, get my son bathed and up to bed. Exhale.

I am a business owner, a HSO committee board member and chairperson of a few committees, a football assistant administrator, a mom, a wife and a dumb ass. I’m a dumb ass because I just added one MORE thing to my already full plate. And this is because…….

I JUST CAN’T SAY NO!

Today at football practice one of the mom’s came over to me. Apparently she saw the flashing neon “I’m a complete sucker” sign on my head and asked me if I would help her out with the town’s upcoming basketball season. And me being me, said “Sure!”

So there you have it. Learn from me:  Prepare your alibi, rehearse it often and just say NO.

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19 Comments. Click to leave one of your own!

  • October 6 2009 at 10:17 PM DG at Diaryofamadbathroom said:

    Women aren’t genetically programmed for no. Which is why I’ll be up late every night this week making 6 centerpieces for a friend’s 50th birthday on Saturday that I was asked to do as of this morning.
    .-= DG at Diaryofamadbathroom´s last blog ..A Monday Kinda Award and a Missing Berry =-.

    [Reply]

    Nancy
    @ on twitter.


    Replied on : October 6th, 2009 at 10:24 PM

    I have a surprise 45th on Saturday! I got asked to get the balloons, streamers and cake. We cane compare notes on Sunday morning :)

    Good luck with the centerpieces!!

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  • October 6 2009 at 10:52 PM Loukia said:

    Oh, isn’t saying ‘no’ the hardest thign to say? Truly, I hate being put on the spot like that, because I never do say no! I’m never quick enough with a good excuse, and also, just saying “I’m busy enough as it is with my kids” sometimes doesn’t feel like a good enough reason, you know?
    .-= Loukia´s last blog ..Excitement. Panic. Realization. Calmness. =-.

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  • October 6 2009 at 11:09 PM maryleigh said:

    Apparently a lot of other people can say no because it’s so difficult to drum up volunteers! Setting healthy boundaries and adhering to priorities is so tough! Look at what our kids get us into!LOL
    .-= maryleigh´s last blog ..? Shouldn’t Children be Encouraged to Defend Themselves? =-.

    [Reply]

    Nancy
    @ on twitter.


    Replied on : October 6th, 2009 at 11:16 PM

    I emailed 24 women to ask for their help in volunteering for a school function. Not one single person replied. I can’t ask by email anymore. I need to resort to personally backing them into a “YES’ corner.

    [Reply]

  • October 6 2009 at 11:57 PM Brittany at Mommy Words
    @ on twitter.
     said:

    This is so tough. I need to do this too – I am always smiling outside and saying yes while shriveling up inside at the thought of more to do! Good luck I don;t know how people do it….especially since you can usually tell when they just don’t want to and I am nervous people will think that of me! Batter Up Nancy!

    [Reply]

    Nancy
    @ on twitter.


    Replied on : October 7th, 2009 at 9:06 PM

    I see over commitment in your future too :)

    [Reply]

  • October 7 2009 at 12:19 AM Dawn
    @ on twitter.
     said:

    I have that same damn neon sign on my head. And I can’t figure out how to shut the thing off. So, usually I just run.

    Good luck!
    .-= Dawn´s last blog ..Beer, Candy and Karate! Oh My! =-.

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  • October 7 2009 at 12:47 AM Unknown Mami said:

    You better say NO to the next thing!
    .-= Unknown Mami´s last blog ..Advice, From Me? =-.

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  • October 7 2009 at 12:58 AM That One Mom
    @ on twitter.
     said:

    Aw, Nancy… You’ll find something to say no to… Something that doesn’t strike you as important or a bond builder between you and your son… Say yes as much as you’re able! They’re only young once!
    .-= That One Mom´s last blog ..Musical Piles =-.

    [Reply]

    Nancy
    @ on twitter.


    Replied on : October 7th, 2009 at 9:12 PM

    I guess that’s part of why I can’t say no. But I’m exhausted!!!!

    [Reply]

  • October 7 2009 at 4:39 AM Michele said:

    Hey Nancy… I was going to give you some shining words of praise as well, but “That one Mom” took the words right out of my mouth!! LOL
    (she’s so cool)

    Another great post.
    “… a football assistant administrator, a mom, a wife and a dumb ass.” Hysterical!!!

    Always enjoy your posts,
    Michele
    .-= Michele´s last blog ..Pigglet on my Plate =-.

    [Reply]

  • October 7 2009 at 5:05 AM Mom of Three
    @ on twitter.
     said:

    I’m a terrible no-sayer too… I think you hit on the solution – advance alibi AND rehearsal! Because we all know we can’t control the OK SURE flying out of our mouths!
    .-= Mom of Three´s last blog ..Gratitude =-.

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  • October 7 2009 at 6:20 AM *Michelle* said:

    Right on! It took me a long time to learn this…..but one day, I was rushing everyone around, barking orders because I needed to run out to a commitment that I SO did not have the time or energy to squeeze in.
    I was gritting my teeth tying my kids shoes, all flustered …..and I looked up and saw my sons face all scrunched up and sad. He asked me why my face looked like that. (laughing now, but felt like some kind of monster/ogre at the time).

    It was then that I decided that I no longer was going to over extend myself. Yes, I will help when I can, but I cannot rob the most important people in my life of my time and happiness, just to go make someone else happy.

    I also found out that people were not as “disappointed” as I thought when I said no.

    great post……can I say that I feel tired just reading it!
    .-= *Michelle*´s last blog ..Listening to the Littlest =-.

    [Reply]

  • October 7 2009 at 10:36 AM Jane said:

    I’m right there with you! One thing that I have started that has helped: At the start of every school year I give myself permission to say “No” to everything during the first month. After that, I try to very carefully pick and choose what I say “Yes” to. Key word? “Try” It doesn’t always work – but it’s helped.
    .-= Jane´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday =-.

    [Reply]

  • October 7 2009 at 11:04 AM blueviolet said:

    Did you just call yourself a dumb ass? I’m gonna have to agree with you on that. ;) LOL

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  • October 7 2009 at 11:55 AM jen smith said:

    again – you gave me my laugh for the day! i will remember this when i get into my school days with the girls — for preschool, i can manage cutting out paper hearts and pumpkins, but i don’t know about all the committees later on…
    we have more pink in our world – see my post! another one!

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  • October 7 2009 at 1:45 PM amie
    @ on twitter.
     said:

    For some reason, motherhood has made me better at saying no. I am not sure why but something switched in me when I had my baby and it was like everyone and everything that didn’t contribute to my goal of loving protecting and caring for my baby could take a back seat or go fly a kite. I used to be so bad at no-ing that I would make myself sick before saying it. But I am proud of myself for getting better at it. It is an empowering word.

    [Reply]

  • October 7 2009 at 8:58 PM susan said:

    Nancy, this post had me laughing out loud! By the way, you are not a dumb ass, you are just too nice. There’s a difference… (LOL!!!)
    .-= susan´s last blog ..Check out these sites =-.

    [Reply]

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